Nicole
After a brief battle with blogger and the ability to post a title, I realize this is the second reference to Alice in Wonderland I will have used in a post. Maybe my subconscious is trying to tell me something.

Let's see now. I could talk about a post a fellow writer made in their blog about acting different during the residency than the time outside of the residency. I suppose I rambled about that sufficiently enough last time, though I guess I could add that my answer is opposite to what theirs was. Anyone who knows me thinks I'm crazy in a good way. I constantly offer cookies as rewards, I demand a pony of my parents every chance I get simply because it's my phrase of the moment, I like to swear because I am able to grasp that words are words even though I will rein myself in order to spare others the so-called horror of those words (but you know, many of them have become quite versatile), I don't mind making stupid sound effects at random times, and there are many other quirks I have that those at residency never saw.

But then, I keep myself quiet until I'm more comfortable around new people before I go off the deep end. You never know who can handle what, so you have to test the waters first. For example, unlike pretty much all my college buddies, many at the residency seemed adverse to swearing, thus upon learning so, I was done with that part of the program. No swearing for Nicole. So sad. Haven't you noticed? My blog is NC-17. Damn right. Anywho, I keep my weirdness away from the world until it's ready for it. Never mind if you think you're weird - who knows? Perhaps your weirdness and mine won't mesh. Maybe you have different thoughts on what is weird. Either way, I was much more reserved at residency than I am here. You'll have to wait before you see my gold blood...

I could also talk about nice guys and nice girls, but that topic has been done to death, since the Ode to the Nice Guy and the retaliation by the Ode to the Nice Girl, which I considered amending to make it fit more for the real Nice Girls (or maybe I should also upgrade the term into Good Girls as Nice Guys have been revamped by many into Good Guys, a mix of bad and good). In the Ode, the Nice Girl is constantly chasing after the Nice Guy who seeks out the whore, bad girl, bitch, etc. in hopes that he will notice her magnificence and correct the error of his ways. Fuck that. I'm not going to chase you if you're too dumb to figure out that woman you're drooling over would sooner step on you than look at you and you're too blind to realize I kick ass. I'll move on to better, greener pastures. We are no longer Nice Girls, but instead Good Girls or some formulation thereof. Perhaps we should go with the term Ladies as it has been transformed from elegant into a term containing a certain amount of sex appeal. We could take back the word and make it our own. We are elegant, but we've got that zesty sex appeal all you boys crave. Also been referred to as the glint (in the eye).

I don't chase anymore. I did for a bit, but I'm done with that. I'll wait until I find what I want. People call me picky. I used to feel insulted - no I wasn't picky! claimed I. And now I think, hell yes I am. What? Did you all want me to lower my standards? Think I should ease up and settle? Haha, screw you bucko. Nicole does not settle. Never mind that I like to dream about Vega or Kaiton or some other fictional character of mine who suddenly appears on my doorstep or shows up at some other obscure location to sweep me away into a different realm. Besides, I'm aware this isn't going to happen, but there's nothing wrong with dreaming. And never mind that men with English/Scottish/Irish/Australian accents turn me to mush, in which case I'm probably screwed in the guy department (or maybe not so if your mind is in the gutter) because I'm in America, land of the All-American boy. Where many of the men these days seem to be either gay, taken, or in the military. Not that I need a pretty boy or a military boy to make my day. No, no, I know what I want. And I have a thought on the whole "bad boy" scenario. At least, I know my thing when it comes to bad boys. Maybe it's not entirely that they're dangerous and exciting, but there's the underlying soft good boy core we'd like to get at. Like, he's bad, but in his heart, he's good and he cares about me like no other.

What I'd like? Oh, I'll take the bad boy in certain situations and with certain circumstances. I don't in real life because I know bad boys are what they are - change in people is difficult, and with many bad things, a change for the good is even more difficult and sometimes just not possible. I'm not going to date some guy from prison in the hopes that he'll turn around and be fabulous. Hahaha, yeah right. In my world though, I'd love to have the guy who had the potential to kill someone, but at the same time treated me as though I were the most precious thing on this earth. I'd love to have the guy willing to die for me - and don't think I'm so selfish. I want the guy I'm willing to die for as well. Ah death - how romantic. Haha. Anyway, the exisitence of such a man is slim to none. That's why you'll find me pining for those that don't exist, because the dream of them is sweeter than the best chocolate. Just tonight I basically melted all over in seeing a particular favorite actor of mine (no, you probably won't guess it so just stop) playing the part of a complete freak and guess what? He threw in an Irish accent with it. *growl* Tasty. Of course, the character wasn't redeemable, but I was busy enjoying his performance as such, since he's usually the goody-goody of the day.

I could go on about my personality twists and what I've simply begun to call my fetish for men with British and British-related accents, but let's move on, shall we? I know, it's NC-17 but that doesn't mean it has to be sex (or lack thereof) and violence. Let's try to get away from my horrible side.

I wrote a story last night. (Wow, abrupt conversation change, no?) Yes, after watching the new Doctor Who episodes (and of course squealing with delight over David Tennant who is insatiably cute...) I started putzing around on the internet to amuse myself and found something on YouTube. I don't even remember what it was now, but I remember the song that looped on the film. It was from the show - and I wanted it. Utilizing my technological resources, I found several pieces of music (and resolved the next day to get the rest - which I now have). It wasn't until 2:30am that I finally flopped down in bed, leaving the music to play (as it was sweet and all of piano and violins and sad flutes and such). But soundtracks tend to have their way with me sometimes, sneaking ideas into my head. I once read somewhere that 90% of writers get their ideas in the shower. I've never once gotten an idea in the shower - but I do have some great ones whilst in bed. Last night was no exception. A man who repairs string instruments...who particularly loves the violin...who makes the strings out of...something...special. Heh. I couldn't let it go - so I hopped out of bed, put the set of songs on loop, and wrote a very brief story. I think I might type it up and plop it somewhere quiet in the internet and leave a link in the WPF (Writing Popular Fiction, remember?) message board for my fellow writers to read if they like. I'm curious to know whether or not it's useable in any fashion (mostly for a short story piece to send in somewhere). Ah, but even if not, it was wonderful to write. I didn't go to bed until 4:30am.

I had two cups of coffee today and even though it's now 2:06am, I'm still going strong.

Finally reviewed some soundtracks and got them off the computer. Good - because I'm running out of space. Need to ease up on the anime I guess. *innocent whistle*

There is one more piece of crucial information...ok, I guess it isn't crucial to anyone at all, but it's still fantastic that I'd like to dish out, but I think that this blog has gotten long enough and also I don't want to ruin something. I sent out a letter to a friend today (that's right, snail mail) that has this piece of info and I'd hate for her to read about it here before she got the letter *coughMegancough*. So I'll hold off for another day. Besides, it will require a lot of gabbing, link posting, and pondering over various ideas. I wonder if I can review another soundtrack before I go to bed...


Personalities are multi-faceted like diamonds. What do you think happens when you unlock mine?
7 Responses
  1. Will Says:

    You. Me. Cussing, Cookies, and Common Sense time at the next Residency. I really regret not gettng to talk to you much last time because you are just the the type of person I like beng around and will always be comfortable. We are the Dirty Duo after all. Ha!


  2. funk doctor Says:

    First I get an R rating. Now I apparently didn't swear enough at Res. If it weren't for my chances at surviving a zombie apocalypse, my self-image would go to shit.


  3. funk doctor Says:

    For some reason, blogger didn't post the rest of my comment. Here goes:

    Having read your blog before res, I was surprised at how little you swore in person. I figured it to be a freedom thing, opening up with the printed word vs face-to-face. Life in the hotel is different than in the dorms, more personal (imo), less group. That said, I hope conditions are prime next time for getting to know more of the real Nicole.


  4. Megan Says:

    I got your letter!! Thank you so much, it totally brought a smile to my face. I love getting snail mail, but it's sad how little I get (aside from credit card bills, yuck). So your letter was awesome!
    Tell Stacy congrats! That's so awesome. 2 in one year, huh? I hope you can make it back out here for mine!
    Talk to you soon- maybe I'll find another wolfy card to send :)


  5. Nicole Says:

    *high fives Will*

    As for you, funk man (why _are_ you the funk doctor anyway?) you don't have to swear at all if you don't want to. =P I just didn't because a lot of others seemed adverse to it or just didn't anyway so I figured I might be better keeping my tongue in check - didn't want to freak anyone out. So no, the blog is not freeing *lol* I'm about the same on here as I am the rest of the time (that is, when I'm comfy being me ^_~)


  6. funk doctor Says:

    Funk Doctor explains himself here: http://funk-doctor.livejournal.com/profile


  7. Stacey Says:

    Hey! I have a ring that's multi-faceted! Wooooo hoooo! (I was walking to lab one morning on a bright sunny day, and decided to look at my ring and move it around in the light, and I literally did a Pete Venkman after that.)