I lost my baby today.

This is Freckles, my dog of 15 years. Isn't she adorable?

Old age finally caught up with her. I won't go into details, though there are so many. But today we had to take her in and let her go.

I'm at a weird place of calm and misery. The calm is for her, really. I watched her go. Drift into that hazy loss of drug-induced sleep until her little heart finally stopped. I didn't sob hysterically like I thought I might, but petted her until dad finally sort of ushered me from the room. She was gone, and staying there wouldn't change anything.

She was a good dog.

The misery, I know, is more for myself. I miss her. Her dog bowls are still downstairs. Her doggie bed is still there. Unless mom and dad have cleared them away already. I can't write this and not be miserable and using a lot of tissues. She wasn't completely my dog, more the family dog, but as time went by, she was mostly my mom's and my dog. My older sister is far off in Missouri, and in a way, she's lucky because she hasn't seen Freckles in so long, she's distanced to it. Oh well.

Freckles, honey, baby, I love you. We'll meet again, in time.
2 Responses
  1. hellolary Says:

    so sorry honey :(

    how are you liking your new home?

  2. hellolary Says:

    haha i saw your post and i was like "WHO THE HELL IS THIS ASKING FOR MY EMAIL ADDRESS" but then i discovered it was you.

    :) i miss you!!